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Two dogs on a rainy day
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Gavin rings the sleigh bells on the back porch door. “Wanna go out, NOW.”
“Hold on let me get a jacket.” I snag one off the hooks by the door. The bells are still ringing. “I’m right here. Stop with the bells already.”
We get outside and it’s raining.
Gavin runs for the door. “Wanna go in, NOW.”
We go in. Gavin doesn’t tell Patty it is raining. Patty wants out. I take her.
A raindrop hits her on the head she tucks her tail and reverses gears. “In. I wanna go in. Oh, please let’s go in.”
We go in.
Both dogs dance around in front of the cupboard. “Cookies! Don’t forget the cookies!” Gavin yells.
Patty sits and throws her front paws high in the air. “Stick ‘em up, I’m doing stick ‘em up! Give me a cookie.”
I give them their cookies, settle down in front of the computer and begin writing.
Five minutes later Gavin is ringing the bells to go out. “I’m bored. Wanna go out, NOW.”
Patty runs to join him. “If he’s going, I am too.”
“It’s still raining.” I tell them as I grab my jacket. Reread.
Posted in Dog related, My blog, Weather related, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Dog humor, Doggoned, Dogs, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Pet humor, Pets, Rescue Dogs, Writer, Writing
Are they there yet?
Posted by doggonedmysteries
I’d give my eye teeth for a week without the construction going on across the street. Seriously, this has gone on for a year now, and I am truly suffering from sleepus interruptus. Going to bed around 5 or 6 a.m. and having the noise start at 7 has worn thin. I might’ve become used to the construction noise had it not been accompanied by one of the workers with a desire to be a singer. The man has a tin ear and a voice that could grate coconut.
I like to sleep with my window opened, but it’s been a year since I could do that. Each day I hope that they’re finished. Each day I am disappointed. I feel like the kid in the car, ‘are we there yet?’
The contractor never seems to finish one project before he starts another. The problem with that is he has had to rip up work he’s already done on many occasions. I have a feeling he’s a relative of the home owner.
He does lovely work. However, I would’ve fired him by now. A couple of days ago I got my hopes up because the front porch looked finished only to have them dashed this morning when I saw they were doing yet another project.
“Oh, to sleep, perchance to dream…”
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
The vacuum from hell
Posted by doggonedmysteries
I seldom vacuum my house. My reason is simple. My vacuum has the decibel level of a jack hammer. The dogs hide in their crates when I start it. I’ve taken to wearing ear protection when running it. Yes, I vacuum the house with my gun range head set on. Have you ever answered a door while wearing those things? I have. It is somewhat disconcerting to people.
Yesterday I ordered a new vacuum. I want a clean house without having to go deaf in the process. I didn’t want another bag less vacuum. I’m tired of choking on dust, dog hair, and dander when I empty it. It also takes filters that cost an arm and a leg if you can find them. I don’t think I can spare the body parts. My vacuum is heavy and awkward. It’s like wrestling with an elephant on wheels with flat tires.
Another thing, it takes forever to suck up dirt and it never gets it all. A work out on wheels that sucks, or rather, doesn’t suck enough isn’t my idea of fun.
The vacuum I ordered is lightweight. I hope it’s quieter than my old one although that should be easy since a 747 landing in my yard would be quieter than the old vacuum.
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, it doesn't suck, it sucks, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, the vacuum from hell, Writer, Writing
Grab a bucket
Posted by doggonedmysteries
I could tell we had rain before I looked out a window, water was drip, drip, dripping in the upstairs hall. I strategically placed a bucket under the leak and dried the floor. I hate this house. We’ve had a constant parade of roofers up on that flat roof during the thirty seven years we’ve owned this house. I couldn’t believe it when we actually had two years without the leak after the last roofer was up there. I guess we’ll call him again.
One of these days, we might even get the leak in the basement to go away. We’re close, it only leaks a little now when we have a considerable amount of rain, like today.
There’s another reason why I hate this house. We bought the house from DH’s parents. No matter how much I change it, it will always be his parent’s house. (Not to mention the leaky roof and basement.)
Never buy a house from an in law or an out law for that matter. The first week after we moved in, we found we had a major termite infestation that WE had to take care of because they wouldn’t. That winter the furnace went out in a blaze of glory and smoked the basement on the coldest day of the year and it was a Sunday. I dare you to try to get that fixed quickly. Then the water heater died. No one mentioned the leaks before we bought the place. Did I mention that I hate this house?
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
Going postal over online banking
Posted by doggonedmysteries
My bank is driving me crazy. For the longest time I had set it up so I could pay certain bills online. I’ve been doing it for a long time. Now suddenly when I went to do this tonight, they said I didn’t have those accounts set up. When did they change it? Why wasn’t I told about it?
Frustrated, I jumped through their hoops and tried to set it up again. After wasting a couple of hours—yes I said hours. I still was unable to pay the bill I wanted to pay. Every time I tried, they gave me a present—an error message. Grrrr.
Well for cripes sake in the time it took me to jump through all those hoops I could’ve written out dozens of checks. Which I did anyway for the bill I wanted to pay because the stupid system wasn’t letting me make the payment online.
Of course, it’s the wee hours of Monday morning so I can’t ask them why. Nor can I ask them what happened to what I’d had set up and been using. Maybe the postal service complained to the banks and they decided to glitch everything so we’d have to mail our payments in.
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, bills, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
Goliath wanted squab for dinner.
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Those of you who have been reading my blog for a while know all about Goliath. For those of you who haven’t, Goliath is one of the four bullfrogs who live in our pond. You can tell which one he is because he makes the other three look tiny. There are a couple of pictures of him on ‘our garden and pond’ page.
Goliath spent last summer begging worms off me. (Actually, he stalked me for the worms that I dug up for the Koi.) Like a fool, I spoiled him by giving them to him. For the past week, we’ve had some nice weather but not too many insects around which means the frogs are ravenous.
I was sitting out on the back steps enjoying the birdsongs and the sounds of the fountains and waterfall. Two mourning doves sat on a wire above the yard. A robin was busy taking a bath in the little pool at the top of the waterfall. When he finished the two doves flew down to stroll around the pond. They patrolled once around, a second time, and on the third lap, I heard a loud splash. The doves flew up from the far side of the pond both were in a panic.
Curious I walked over to the edge of the pond and there sat Goliath on top of a lily pad pot. A couple tan tail feathers protruded from his mouth. If ever a frog could, he had a ‘rats, foiled again’ look on his face.
Posted in Misc, my garden, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Gardening, Gardens, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Pet humor, Pets, Pond, Ponds, Writer, Writing
Happy Saint Patrick’s Day everyone!
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Posted in My blog
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Dog humor, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
The trespasser
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Gavin and Patty jockeyed for the best position at the kitchen window. They wanted to see and bark at the dark stranger in the yard. He ignored them.
Gavin barked, “My yard!”
Patty yodeled, “Get out. You don’t belong there.”
Gavin ran to the back door and rang the sleigh bells like a street corner Santa on speed. “Let me at him.”
Patty leapt upon the radiator. “Why I oughta…”
“Quiet you two. Enough!” I dragged Patty off the radiator and backed Gavin away from the bells. “One more peep out of you and you’ll kennel up until you cool down.”
DH yelled down the stairs, “What the heck is with them?”
“Woo, Woo, Woof!”
“That’s it. Kennels.”
They retreated to their crates and I closed the doors behind them. Then I went to the bottom of the stairs to thank DH for the ruckus.
“You had to mention there was a big old crow in the yard using words they know didn’t you?”
“What?”
“You said, ‘look, outside, and yard’ and you used an excited tone. They ran to look outside and saw the damned crow.”
“Oh. Sorry about that.”
{Sigh} Is there such a thing as a quiet day?
Posted in Dog related, Misc, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Dog humor, Doggoned, Dogs, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Pet humor, Pets, Rescue Dogs, Writer, Writing
A mystery writer’s alphabet
Posted by doggonedmysteries
A is for assassin. B is for blood. C is for cop. D is for dead. E is for elephants to hide the little clues. F is for facts we keep them accurate. G is for guns we like to use them, lots of them. H is for hunt our protagonists must hunt for clues and killers, or homicide if that’s what you choose. I is for interest we must keep yours. J is for jail where we hope our killer goes.
K is for killer, or knife, or even keep it simple. L is for love life does the main character have one? M is for murder of course. N is for nefarious our bad guys must be this. O is for outline a pain in the butt. P is for plausibility. Q is for questions we ask and answer. R is for rewrite we do many. S is for study. T is for tension. U is for usage think Strunk and White. V is for variety. W is write, and write and write some more. X is the spot marked on the map. Y is you the reader we must satisfy. Z is the end.
Posted in My blog, My books, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
They say a picture is worth a thousand words…
Posted by doggonedmysteries
-
- Mine! {Sigh, baby sisters are a pain}
-
- I said gimme!
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- Gimme
-
- I want his
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- Bone chewing time
Gavin can be so tolerant…
Posted in Dog related, Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Dog humor, Doggoned, Dogs, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Pet humor, Pets, Rescue Dogs, Writer, Writing
In a pickle regarding my concentration
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Describe it? How does one describe that? I would have given the giant a proper answer, but I couldn’t concentrate on his question. What a pickle.
The giant impatiently drummed his fingers on the counter top. This made a din as loud a midsummer thunderstorm. I barely heard his next question. “Is it bigger than a pile of troll poop?”
“How big is a pile of troll poop?” After fleeing from a few of them this past night, I had a general idea, but it couldn’t hurt to be sure.
“About as big as you, you little human turd.”
“My, aren’t you the sweetheart. Does your mother know you talk this way?” How about that. I made a giant blush. “Isn’t there some other way to find my concentration without a description?
“You could hire a guide gnome and go look for it in the back.”
“What’s that going to cost me?”
“You have a garden?”
“Um, yeah.” I shuddered at the thought of having a gnome in my garden. I doubted my gargoyles would approve. Would they go on strike? Oh dear, imagine that picket line.
The gnome guide led me through the weirdest collection of items I’ve ever seen. He kept singing a little ditty under his breath about having to get out of here.
“You’ll know you’ve found it when you feel a tug on your brain.”
“A what?”
“A tug. A pull. Are all of you humans so dense?”
We were on the second floor near the back wall when I felt a yank not a simple tug. I still can’t describe it but as it settled onto my head and sank into my brain, I felt at ease once again.
Hey Jim, your balance should arrive soon. I told them where to send it.
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
The hunt for my concentration
Posted by doggonedmysteries
A loud buzzer sounded inside. The door, groaning on its hinges, opened at a snail’s pace. Shades of a D grade horror film. I hate horror films.
A green cloud billowed out of the opening. The foul stench made me gag. I thought nothing could be worse than Gavin’s farts—I was wrong.
Two steps in found me hopelessly tangled in a spider’s web of sticky, red tape. My muse wasn’t kidding. All I needed now was to have some giant, horror of a spider skulking above me. Don’t look. You won’t be happy if you look. Beads of nervous sweat rolled down my back.
I used my trusty little pocket knife to hack through the gluey strands. Like a jungle explorer, I slashed my way forward. Eight struggling steps brought me to a tall counter, the top of which was even with my forehead. I had to back up two steps to see over it. I wished I hadn’t.
“Fee Fi Fo Fum. I smell a human who must be dumb.” The giant glared at me.
My first attempt to answer came out as a mouse squeak. I cleared my throat and answered again. “Not dumb, determined. I lost my concentration and I need to find it.”
“Can you describe it?”
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
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