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At the lost and found warehouse
Posted by doggonedmysteries
We’d been driving through the Whimsy Warehouse District for over an hour when my muse pointed at a nondescript, three floor high cement block building. “There it is, over there.”
“It had better be the right building this time.”
“I’m sure it is.”
“That’s what you said at the last half dozen or so buildings. Just for the record, I’m not fond of being chased by vicious trolls with huge teeth.”
“You don’t have to be mean.” My muse’s lower lip quivered and her eyes filled with tears. “I told you I was sorry. I haven’t been out here for over a quarter of a century. ”
“No need for waterworks.” I parked in front of the building. A small sign with ‘L&F’ crudely painted on it hung above door. “It really doesn’t look as if they want this found.”
“They don’t.”
“Does that mean more trolls?”
“Um, not so much.”
I hesitated on opening my door. “What does that mean?”
“Red tape. Lots of red tape.”
“No trolls?”
“No trolls.”
I got out of the car but my muse didn’t. Red flags went up. “Are you coming?”
“I’d rather stay in the car.”
“Why?”
She refused to answer. I shrugged, trudged through the flags to the door, and rang the tiny doorbell that was nearly out of my reach…
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
Where did my concentration go?
Posted by doggonedmysteries
If I keep banging my head on my keyboard, I’m going to need a new one. I could blame my muse but it really isn’t her fault.
“Damned right it isn’t my fault.”
“No comments from the peanut gallery. May I continue?”
“Be my guest.”
The fault is mine. I can’t seem to concentrate. Maybe it’s from being stuck in the house so long. Could it possibly be the lack of sunshine and fresh air? My muse has tried to keep me on track.
“Yes, I have. You aren’t cooperating though.”
“If you keep interrupting I won’t get this post finished.”
“Shutting up now.”
“Good.”
As I said, my muse has tried to keep me on track.
“Quit repeating yourself. That nasty little editor will show up if you don’t stop.”
“Would you rather write this?”
“It’s against the rules.”
“What rules? Oh, never mind.”
I’ve lost my concentration. If I hunt for it, will I find it? Is there a lost and found warehouse for these things? Is there a grouchy old man behind a counter guarding all the lost concentration? Will I need to fill out a special form to get it back? To be continued…
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
“Toto, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore…”
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Actually, I haven’t been in Kansas for many years. In spite of this, since my sweatshirt happens to have that quote on it, I figured it was good place to start. After the howling winds and abundance of snow that we had last night, when I put the shirt on today, it brought to mind the adventures of Dorothy in the Land of Oz. I’ve thought of it off and on all day and it’s no wonder. I can day dream with the best of them.
My imagination was in high gear as I sat at my desk trying to write a troubling scene. Is it no wonder that I drifted off while staring out at my world? Not unlike Dorothy, leaving the dull confines of a land in sepia tones, I sought to escape my land. Although what I saw wasn’t sepia tones but far too much white. Tomorrow it will still all be white with gray clouds to go along with it.
Oh, how nice it would be to wake in a land of bright colors and perfect weather. However, with my luck, a house would land on me, my toes would curl up, and I’d disappear.
Posted in Misc, My blog, Weather related, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Not in Kansas, Novel writing, Snow, The Land of Oz, Writer, Writing
All aboard the train to Crazy Town
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Sometimes I feel like the train’s conductor. At other times, I feel like a passenger. During some conversations with DH, I feel as though I’ve stepped on the train, handed the conductor my ticket to punch, and am on my way. Woo, woo!
It usually starts with him saying something from left field. You know, that place where you have no idea what the heck he’s talking about or where it came from.
My normal response is, “What?”
He must think I’m hard of hearing because he repeats what he said louder.
“I heard you. I’m asking you what you are talking about not what you said.”
He repeats what he said.
“Where did that come from?”
It came from some subject long past that has slipped out of my mind and meandered down the tracks. Time has gone by, subjects have changed, and I’m not losing my mind I’ve moved on. I’m sure you know how it is. 37 years with this man, you think I’d be used to it by now, but he can still drive me ‘round the bend at times.
Chugga, chugga, choo, choo. The train has left the station.
Posted in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
There’s snow crazy like snow crazy
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Standing at the kitchen window, I yelled and shook my fist at the sky. “Stop, stop, stop!”
The snowflakes fell paying me no heed.
DH walked into the kitchen and looked at me as if I’d lost my mind. I guess I have lost what little of it I had left. This has been a very long winter with far too much snow.
“Go away. Go visit Cousin Carol in Boston.” Sorry Carol, but you didn’t get the last storm. I have visions of her giving me a Gibbs slap for that one.
I railed at the sky, and yet, as I did, the snow continued to fall.
“Turn to rain, please turn to rain.”
“Have you finished ranting at the weather yet?” DH asked.
“No.”
“Did it stop it?”
“No.”
“Then why do it?”
“I do it because it makes me feel better.”
“You’re nuts.”
“I am.” I made a face and did a silly dance. “I always have been, but isn’t that part of why you married me?”
He chuckled and threw a pillow at me.
I caught the pillow and threw it back. “I love you too. I’d love you more if you could make it stop snowing.”
Posted in Misc, My blog, Weather related, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
Now my characters are chewing me out
Posted by doggonedmysteries
“Where the heck have you been?” My main character asked me as I sat down to write.
“I’ve been busy.”
“That’s a fine thing. You go haring off to deal with your life and leave me stuck here up to my neck in trouble.” She stands with arms crossed over her chest.
“It’s not as if your neck is flesh and blood you know.”
She begins to pout. “Oh, yeah? Hey, you keep that attitude up and I’ll walk.”
“You’ll only do that if I give you legs and a place to go.” I reached for the delete key.
“Don’t get hasty, you know you like me.”
I pulled my hand back. “You’re the one who jumped on me not the other way around.”
“Okay, I apologize. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”
“Let’s see if I can get you out of your little situation.”
“If? What do you mean by if? You better get me out of this or you’ll have to write a whole new character to take my place.”
“Quiet. I’m working on it.” Type, type, type…
“Are you kidding me? You want me to do what? Who do you think I am Wonder Woman?”
“Oh, for cryin’ out loud.” Delete, delete, delete…
Posted in My blog, My books, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
Ouch, that hurts!
Posted by doggonedmysteries
DH broke his big toe. I know because I’ve done it myself more than once. He’d been complaining about his toe since he fell on Tuesday. Tonight he noticed the bruising. He came downstairs to show me.
I looked at it…nodded my head, and said, “Yep, it’s broken.”
“It hurts,” he said.
“I know it does. Are you going back to bed now?”
“Yeah, but did you see how black and blue it is?”
“It is bruising some. Another day or two and it’ll look real ugly.”
All you can do for a broken toe is wait for it to heal. This is going to be a long six weeks.
Men whine, their theatrics when sick or hurt are often worthy of Oscars.
For best actor in the drama… Flu Days, we present this award to…
For best actor in the comedy… We All Fall Down, the award goes to…
Don’t get me wrong, I feel for him. I really do. As I said, I’ve been there.
Posted in Misc, MS related, My blog
Tags: Author, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing
Even dogs get cabin fever
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Neither Patty nor Gavin enjoy trudging through the deep snow outside. Therefore, they’ve begun to romp inside more than usual with DH and me taking the brunt of their zest. They run around like maniacs and use us as bumpers when they make turns. Either that or they leap onto our laps leaving black and blue paw prints behind.
Gavin had quieted down and had stretched out alongside me in my chair. He likes an afternoon nap. Patty was still looking for mischief. First, she poked his paw with her nose as she walked by. Then she walked past again and nosed his chest. The third time by she poked him in the nose a couple of times. I must say Gavin tried mightily to ignore her.
She, who is not to be ignored, wanted to play. She went and stood by DH’s chair and studied Gavin for a few minutes. Gavin was trying to doze. He even faked it by closing his eyes tight. However, I could feel his body tense as he sensed her scrutiny.
Patty walked past us and went into the kitchen. A few seconds later, she bounded back into the living room and pounced on both of us. Gavin shot out of the chair, bully runs and hucklebutts ensued. I can’t wait until they can burn off some energy outside.
Posted in Dog related, My blog, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Dog humor, Doggoned, Dogs, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Pet humor, Pets, Rescue Dogs, Snow, Writer, Writing
Where did my brain go?
Posted by doggonedmysteries
My brain went on a vacation. However, it did leave several voice mails for me.
Message 1: “Um, hello? Geez, I hate voicemail. Anyway, this is your brain. I’m going on vacation. I hear that Hawaii doesn’t have snow.”
Message 2: “It’s me again. You know. Your brain? I just wanted to let you know I forgot to put coffee on the grocery list, you might want to do that.”
Message 3: “Just arrived in Honolulu. It’s a balmy 71. I hear it’s supposed to hit 81 this afternoon. Enjoy the snow. Neener neener neener.”
I threw my cell phone against the wall. If my brain wants to be nasty about it, I won’t listen to my voicemail.
I received a strange E-mail. “This is your brain in Hawaii. It’s sunny and warm. Did the next snow storm hit yet?”
There were pictures too. My brain sitting on the beach sipping on a Mai Tai. (It had better make sure it showers off all that sand. There’s nothing worse than sand in the crevices.) My brain at a luau doing the hula. (Don’t ask it isn’t pretty.) Then there’s the picture of my brain at the pineapple farm. (Great, I’m allergic to pineapple so now I’ll be itchy.)
I hate my brain.
Posted in Misc, My blog, Weather related, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, funny, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Snow, Writer, Writing
Psst, Phil. Dere’s a contract out on youse
Posted by doggonedmysteries
The phone rang. I answered it. A strange, gravelly voice on the other end of the line threw chills down my spine.
“Youse wanted a contract?”
“What?” I pulled the phone from my ear for a second and peered at it as if I could see whom it was that asked me such an odd question.
“I heard youse wanted to put out a contract on some guy called Phil. I’m your guy.”
“I have no idea what you are talking about. I don’t know anyone called Phil. Wait. Is this a joke? Did Jackie put you up to this?”
“C’mon lady. I don’t know any Jackie an’ I ain’t joking wid youse. Ricky Da Nose tol’ me today you wanted somebody to off dis Punksadohicky Phil guy,” he growled.
“Do you mean Punxsutawney Phil?”
“Yeah, dat guy.”
“It’s too late.”
“What, did someone beat me to da contract?”
“No. It’s simply too late. He already saw his shadow.”
“Whaddaya mean by dat? He croak?”
“Yeah. He croaked.”
“Damn, I coulda used da money.”
“Sorry about that.”
“Well, if youse needs ta have anybody else offed, you call me. I’ll do it fer cheap.”
“I’ll do that.”
Posted in Misc, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, funny, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Snow, Writer, Writing
Snow, snow, snow, and more snow
Posted by doggonedmysteries
It is prettier when you don’t have to shovel it. Snow has been the topic uppermost on people’s minds around here. There’s too much of it. The entire neighborhood has managed to dig out but the city hasn’t plowed the street. Geez, they didn’t even run through with a salt truck yet.
AJ from AJ Wildflower arrived today and cleared off our walk and driveway. She and her helper did a great job, and they even salted everything down when they finished. Good thing too since there was some melting of snow going on and the driveway is now dry and ice free.
They blew all the snow from the driveway into the yard. It’s so deep at that end now, that it makes me wonder if we’ll ever see the grass again. It’s going to take a huge upward jump in temperature to put a dent in it. But noooo, the forecast for here is showing wind chills dropping us down to 5 degrees by the time the sun comes up.
I’m ready to go groundhog hunting. Dang thing just had to see his shadow didn’t he?
Posted in Weather related, Writer, Writing
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, comedy, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Snow, Writer, Writing
The blizzard of February 2010
Posted by doggonedmysteries
Even though the storm hammered us here, south of us had it worse. I’m so glad I don’t live too near to Philly.
I dug a very short path out into the yard for the pups. I had to clear the snow. they couldn’t get off the back porch. Patty is the more energetic of the two and she went a bit past the end of their path, however, when it came time to squat, she didn’t like the snow hitting her butt. She retreated to the shoveled area.
Some of the neighbors have already dug their cars out but with the street unplowed, they’ve no place to go. Early this afternoon when the storm was at its height my next door neighbor was trying to shovel her car out so they could go to the store.
“Are you nuckin’ futs? You aren’t supposed to be on the roads unless it’s an emergency.” I said.
“I need some groceries.”
“Whatever you need, if I have it it’s yours. Please don’t try to drive in this crap.”
Posted in Weather related
Tags: Author, Beads, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Coffee, Craft of writing, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Home, Humor, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Snow, Writer, Writing
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