Blog Archives

You want drama? Take my yesterday, please!

     The Curmudgeon collapsed on the back porch yesterday.  For the life of me, I couldn’t get him on his feet.  I ran over and got two of my neighbors to help him.  This was all before my first cup of coffee, therefore I was cranky.  I hate being cranky with him.  I know it’s not his fault that these things happen.

     I spent the rest of the day running back and forth doing whatever he needed to have done.  If I cussed and babbled it was because of fear.  I also apologized to him for doing so.  It seemed as though I didn’t get a minute to rest when I’d be hopping up again to get something for him.  He knows I love him but I’m sure I made him feel awful a couple of times where I was so tired I felt as though I couldn’t catch my breath.  Better I cuss a bit than bottle all that fear and frustration inside.

     I curse all those MS agencies and societies that claim they help.  They don’t.  If they did, I might have a few solutions on how to better deal with days like this.  I’d have help for his bad days so I don’t end up back in the hospital.  It seems that once MS goes into Secondary Progressive even the doctors tend to back away.  Don’t give me sympathetic looks, don’t roll your eyes at me when I ask what’s available in the way of help, we aren’t a research project we are human beings at the ends our ropes.

     Once The Curmudgeon settled into bed for the night, I poured a glass of Chocovine.  It was a long chase but I finally caught my breath.

     You all have a good one!  I’m going to try.

The iris and columbine are beginning to bloom

Yes, the garden needs a good weeding.  No, I haven’t had the energy to do it.

These iris are along the driveway.

This lovely blue one is in the side garden by the sweet gum tree.

The first of the columbine plants to bloom.  I may have lost one this winter…

I hate grocery shopping more and more

     The store wasn’t crowded so that wasn’t it.  The clerk at the check out was neither surly nor slow, she was quite pleasant and quick.  I hate trudging down aisle after aisle, loading bag after bag into my car, and then unloading the car once I get home.  Even putting the things away has become more a hateful chore than anything.

      By the time I get the car unloaded and the groceries put away I’m so tired I can hardly see straight.  All I want to do is go take a nap.  However, that’s not possible because it is almost dinner time.

     I have dogs barking at me for their dinners.  The Curmudgeon asking me, “What’s for dinner?”  Can I stop and take a short break for maybe five minutes? 

     Okay, now give me a little cheese to go with my whine…we all need to whine occasionally.

     You all have a good one!

MS spasticity problems

     I was going to write about our freakish pre-Halloween snowstorm, but since two a.m. yesterday morning DH has been having some dire spasticity problems.  He went down on the bedroom floor and once I got him into the bed, I knew I was up for the duration.  I’ve had very little sleep since our party.

     DH collapsed onto the bathroom floor again later yesterday morning he’d gone in there without a cane, calling me,  or any other means of support. 

     My back is out from all the bending to fill short people’s Trick or Treat bags, there was no way I could get him up.  G and her hubby weren’t home so I couldn’t ask them.  I pounded on the next door neighbor’s door and soon Carlos was over to aid DH in getting back into his bed.

     I put the walker by the bed so when DH made another run to the bathroom he had a better way to get there.  He was NOT pleased about needing the walker.

    The next time he remembered to call for me and I went up to be with him while he went from the bedroom to the bathroom and back again.  Success!  The walker worked in getting him back and forth without incident.   Now maybe I can get some sleep.

     It was probably the best day for this to happen since we had all that snow and no need to go anywhere.

There are bad days and there are good days

 

     Some days, I find myself terrified out of my wits when I see DH having trouble getting around.  Yesterday was one of those days.  More hot weather had his MS in an uproar after he was only outside for a little while.

     When he can barely walk from one end of the room to the other, tears make my vision swim.  My heart weighs heavy in my chest as I watch him struggle to stand upright.  I can hear my brain screaming, “I can’t do this.”  Then my heart speaks up and says, “You love him.  Yes you can.”  Yes, I can do this.  No matter what my fears, I can overcome them and be here for him.

     I’ve learned only to offer my help when he is at his worst.  Any other time, he growls at me.  I know he doesn’t mean to be such a bear but sometimes it’s his only defense against feeling helpless. 

     Then there are those special days when I wander downstairs from an inadequate night’s sleep to find he’s poured my coffee and he has it fixed exactly the way I like it.  Then he smiles at me and I fall in love with him all over again.  We can do this no matter what his MS throws at us.

Calgon, take me away!

 

     With the MIL’s house almost ready for painting, I had hoped my stress levels would drop knowing we might be able to put it on the market soon. 

     Then we got the county tax, city tax, and school real estate tax bills for the house.  EEEEEKS!!!!  I can’t believe how high they are when compared to ours.  Double taxes, double utilities, double maintenance, this completely sucks.  Moreover, we haven’t received the estimate for the roof repairs yet and we still have to pay for the funeral.

     Excessive stress doesn’t help when it comes to writing.  I find myself getting easily distracted all the time.  Even reading, which for me is a passion, is difficult.  All I can do is wait it out and hope for the best.

Movie day

 

     G and I finally went to see the last Harry Potter movie.  We had a good time.  There were only a few other people in the theater with us.  That’s why we wait so long to go to these.  We both hate crowded theaters.  Naturally, I forgot to bring my denim shirt to cover my arms and didn’t wear sneakers and socks.  I froze and my feet felt like blocks of ice when we left.  G wore sandals but had the sense to bring a sweater.  Only her feet froze.

     We’d both read all the books and with the time constraints of a movie we think they did it well.

     The Smurf movie and ‘Aliens and Cowboys’ were doing a brisk business on their first day of release.  We were so glad not to be in those theaters since they were loaded with children-type people.

I will stop giggling later

 

     I had my laugh for the night at around two-thirty in the morning.  Some idiot was racing his not-so-quiet motorcycle up and down the street.  He forgot one thing…Roads, which have been dry for a long time and are suddenly wet, are slippery.  He made a u-turn in front of my yard, the motorcycle went one way, and he went another.  I saw him land on his feet as the motorcycle jumped out from under him and landed on its side.

     I couldn’t stop laughing and I had to rush Patty inside before I collapsed.  Then, while trying to keep a straight face, I went out the front door and asked Mr. Keneival if he was okay.  He was.  I went back inside and giggled like a fool for a while. 

     If he’d been injured, I would’ve called for aid.  As it was, he was more embarrassed knowing someone had seen the incident than anything else.

     I wish I had it on video—it was priceless.

A few more steps and we are out of the tunnel!

 

     G and I filled my van again.  This time we had two stops to make with all the stuff.  The first one was to a local rehab hospital to donate the MIL’s wheelchair, walkers, and other items.  They were delighted to see us come in with the load. 

     Our second stop was at Goodwill to empty out the rest of the items from the back of my van.  This time we left them 15 boxes and 14 household items.  Last time they got 25 boxes and a dozen household items.

     The house is almost empty now much to our relief.  We have one more trip to Goodwill to make on Sunday where we’ll drop off the sewing machine in the cabinet and some other things we couldn’t fit in the van this time.

     After that, the only thing left for me to do is to get some help to load and bring home the armoire and dresser.  Then I can call the painters for an estimate.  Our roofer checked the roofs and he’s working up an estimate now.  We are two steps closer to finishing this. 

If it isn’t one thing…

 

     As wonderful as having the much-needed rain arrive was, we had a problem.  Our roof leaked again.  Yesterday I caught our roofer outside and told him.  (His business is two doors down from us.) He did an actual double take.  He was shocked.  Three minutes later, he had his helper on the roof looking for the leak. 

     They think they found it.  It seems that when the next-door neighbors had their new roof put on years ago the idiot that did it nailed their shingles through our slates.  He didn’t nail them to the roof divider.  Thus, we have a leak. 

     Our roofer thinks they have solved that problem now.  The next problem is we really need to replace the flat roof.  He says there are two roofs on there and that they both should be removed and a new one installed.  I told him when we sell the MIL’s house, we‘d have him do it.  It’d be nice to be certain of no leakage in the next twenty years.

     The other day he inspected the MIL’s roof.  The news wasn’t great.  He confirmed that we’d have to replace the garage roof.  Oh.  What fun.

Rain glorious rain

 

     We finally got some rain, a great deal of rain.  The flash flood warnings were out in force.  I didn’t have to water my garden or potted plants.  In fact, I had to tip some water out of a couple of pots.  Am I complaining?  Not a bit. 

     Our brown lawn is already greening up, the trees that were looking droopy now look blissful, and the gardens have perked up tremendously.  The birds are excited because now that the ground is moist again the worms are closer to the surface.

     The air is cooler and it was nice to go outside and not feel as though I was suffocating.  Even DH is feeling more chipper.  The pups spent the day chasing each other around the house.

Bringing you up to date

 

     Yesterday we didn’t go over to the MIL’s house as we’d planned to because Neither G nor I felt up to working in this heat.  We hope the break in the weather we’re supposed to get will make it easier to work on Wednesday.

     We still have many small items to pack and remove along with books to take to recycling.  Don’t worry I removed all the good books.  There weren’t many, the MIL wasn’t big on reading anything.  The books left are an assortment of ‘miracle cure’ books and piles of ‘How to’ books she left in boxes in the cellar where they got wet and moldy. 

     Sunday, was a good day to stay home and catch up on some housework.  It was too hot to work outside so a few neglected indoor chores took precedence.