G now holds the title of Queen Klutz
Do you remember when I sprained both ankles after taking the tumble on the uneven sidewalk in our back yard? Then all the other Klutzy things I’ve done? I have been dethroned. I bow down to my dear friend G. She outdid me on Thursday night.
G and a friend went to a local college theater to see the Mikado. She was going to tell me all about it today, but when I didn’t hear from her, I thought I’d go over and visit. As I normally do, I walked through her back gate, up her deck steps, knocked on the screen door, and gave her a ‘yoo hoo!’ Imagine my surprise to see her limping to the door.
“What the heck did you do?” I stared at her.
“I tumbled down some steps.”
“What steps?”
“Over at the college by the theater entrance. I didn’t get to the play.”
“Holy crap, woman.”
“Yeah, I did a real good job falling.” She began to point out her injuries.
Her badly sprained, very swollen ankle, the cut on the outside edge of her eyebrow, the beginnings of a hell of a shiner, her left wrist—wrapped in an ACE bandage, and the shinbone on the other leg was looking quite colorful.
“Geez and I thought I held the record for klutziness.”
“I think I’ve got you beat. There’s more.” She showed me the bruise on her elbow and her chipped glasses.
“Egads! I do believe you’ve taken the title from me. Do you want me to get you a couple of fresh ice packs? Want to borrow my crutches?”
“No, I just iced everything.” She showed me a cane. “My hands are both so sore I have trouble using this so I don’t think crutches would help.”
“I don’t suppose they would. Can I get you anything?”
“No. I’m fine.”
“You let me know if you need anything.
“I will.”
“You know you’re my blog post tonight.”
“Gee, thanks.”
“Anything for you.”
“Yeah. Anyway, they were very nice to me at the college. They wanted to call an ambulance but I said no. They even exchanged our tickets for a later show. We’re going to try to see the play again, next Thursday.”
“Stay away from those stairs.”
Posted on June 19, 2010, in Misc, My blog, Writer, Writing and tagged Author, Bones, books, Books on writing, Bull Terriers, Care giving, Caregiver, Craft of writing, Crafts, Dead, Disability, Doggoned, Family, Fiction, Home, Humor, I lost my Klutz Queen title, Life, Love, MS, Multiple Sclerosis, Murder, Mysteries, Mystery, Novel writing, Writer, Writing. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.
Doggonedmysteries 
I just don’t know. You have gained your title by virtue of many escapades, while G did it all in one fell swoop. I think you may have earned different titles. Both definitely outstanding, but different in scope.
Aw, she can hold the title until my next escapade.
I actually own the title (and have a Google alert set up for it, hence how I found this post)
I have written an entire book entitled “Queen Klutz”, available here:
http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/queen-klutz/2564926
Your stories are entertaining, though! All the best to you.
Hey, thanks for stopping by. I’ll have to check out your book…maybe buy two copies one for me and one for G.
And here I thought I was the Queen – if it is in front of me, beside me, around me, underneath me, somehow even above me — I will find it and trip over it and fall on it – shades of the Ice Escapade of 2009. I truly feel for your friend – I share her bruises, scratches, nicks, swollen appendages, etc. Tis a shame but some of us just were meant to live in zero gravity…not here on earth where things jump out at us and hurt us. 😉
Ain’t it the truth.